The first few months with someone new are basically an information-gathering mission, whether you admit it or not. You're building a mental model of who this person actually is: what they laugh at, what scares them, what they'd do with a free Saturday. Most of that comes out naturally over time, but not all of it does, and waiting for the right moment to ask something real can mean you never ask it at all.
Having a few good questions for new relationships ready solves that. Not a script, just a handful of prompts you can pull out when the conversation has room to breathe.
The 25 questions below aren't invented for this article. They're pulled directly from CouplesQuiz's own "get to know someone new" quiz mode, the same prompts real couples are answering inside the app right now.
1. Light Icebreakers
These are the low-stakes ones. Nobody gets caught off guard by a question about favorite smells, which makes them a good place to start a conversation that might wander somewhere more interesting on its own.
- Favorite childhood memory? An easy opener that almost always leads somewhere warmer than expected.
- Most hated food? Small, funny, and surprisingly revealing about how someone was raised.
- First impression when we first met? Fun to compare notes on, especially if the answers don't match.
- Favorite childhood TV show? A quick window into what someone found comforting as a kid.
- Favorite smell? Oddly specific, which is exactly why it gets a real answer instead of a rehearsed one.
- Favorite time of day? Tells you more about someone's rhythm and energy than you'd think.
If you want a lower-pressure format for this stage, this or that questions work well too. They keep the tone light while you're both still feeling things out.
2. Personality & Preferences
Once the ice is actually broken, these questions start filling in the shape of who this person is: how they see themselves, what they're proud of, what bugs them.
- Biggest pet peeve? Small annoyances are often the most honest thing someone will tell you.
- Favorite way to relax? Useful and practical. You'll want this one eventually anyway.
- Favorite season, and why? The "why" is where the actual answer lives.
- Favorite movie of all time? A classic for a reason, and a good gauge of taste and sentimentality.
- A real strong suit? Watch how comfortable someone is naming their own strengths.
- Favorite thing about oneself? A gentler version of the last one, and often harder to answer.
- First thing noticed about people? Tells you what someone pays attention to, which says a lot about them.
All 25 live inside CouplesQuiz
Answer separately, then compare — CouplesQuiz's "new relationship" quiz mode is built specifically for this early stage.
3. Values & Deeper Ground
This is where the questions stop being fun facts and start touching on how someone actually thinks. Save these for when the conversation has already found some momentum.
- Most valued thing in a friendship? A good proxy for what they'll expect from a relationship too.
- Biggest fear about relationships? Direct, and worth asking gently rather than as a checklist item.
- Something worth learning earlier in life? Regret and hindsight, asked kindly.
- Philosophy on life? Big and a little unfair as a question, but the answer is often more grounded than expected.
- What sparks a feeling of truly being alive? One of the better questions for getting past small talk entirely.
- A reason for gratitude today? Simple, present-tense, and a nice way to close out a heavier stretch of conversation.
If this section is the kind of territory you want to spend more time in, deep conversation starters for couples has more prompts built for exactly this stage, once you're past the getting-to-know-you phase.
4. Looking Forward
These questions shift from who someone is to what they want, which tends to bring out a different kind of honesty.
- Something on the bucket list? Practical and dreamy at the same time.
- Best gift ever? A good way to learn what actually lands with someone.
- Something new worth trying? Half question, half invitation. Don't be surprised if it turns into a plan.
- Favorite family tradition? A quiet look at what someone grew up valuing.
- Favorite place from past travels? Reliably turns into a longer story than expected.
- Dream vacation? Fun on its own, and useful information for later.
If you're looking for a lighter way to close out one of these conversations, truth or dare questions for couples is a good gear shift after a heavier round of talk.
How to Actually Ask These
Pace them. Don't run through all 25 in one sitting. It turns a conversation into an interview, and interviews are exactly what you're trying to avoid this early on. A few per date is plenty. Let the rest come up naturally over the following weeks.
Context matters too. The light icebreakers work almost anywhere, in line for coffee, in a car, over a bad first-date silence. The values and looking-forward questions do better somewhere quieter, without a waiter hovering. If you're planning an evening around this, indoor date night ideas has settings that give a conversation like this room to actually happen.
One more thing worth remembering: it's fine if a question doesn't land right away. Some of these are better asked a second or third time, weeks apart, because the answer can change as you both get more comfortable.
Ask Them Inside CouplesQuiz
All 25 of these questions live in CouplesQuiz's "new relationship" quiz mode, built specifically for this early stage. You answer them separately, then compare answers together, which tends to surface a better conversation than just reading a list off a phone. Once things get more serious, the app also has daily questions to keep things fresh and deeper quizzes for when you're ready to talk about things like money, family, or the future. For a preview of what a full date-night conversation can look like once you're past this stage, best date night questions is a good next stop.